Dear Camera, I'd Like To Confess...

I have to confess that I am kinda expecting the new Idols competition which starts next Sunday. Not because I'd want to know who'll the winner be, but because of the first few episodes when the most awful, horrible and pathetic singer-wannabes are trying to impress the judges. I don't know why but it really fascinates me how some people have the iron-hard self confidence to go and ridicule themselves in front of a dozen cameras and consequently thousands of people. Have they never heard themselves singing? Or don't they just care? Some are clearly in denial, at least judging by their outraged reactions to the judge's decision. There's no way I'd do that, I know exactly how much I suck at singing - my dear departed dog used to leave the room whenever I had the urge to sing. I took the hint.

The human mind works in mysterious ways and hope clearly springs eternal. Whatever the reason for their (and mine) behaviour is, I'm going to make myself a huge pile of popcorn and have a pillow ready so that I can cover my eyes when the most embarrassing contestants are performing.

It's like watching a particularly well-made horror movie, really. All you want to do is shout "don't go there! For all that is good in this world, do not open your mouth!" and then when they inevitably continue singing and your other eye is watering and the other won't even open up anymore and you can feel your mind devolving to a level beyond retarded and all you want to do is to crawl under a very large rock because of all the embarrassment by association and you fear that nothing will ever, ever be the same anymore, that something pure and beautiful has been destroyed forever you realize that while everything you're seeing is true it'll be over soon. And then the flesh stops crawling and the brain fires up all the neurons necessary for a good fascinated wondering. Why would anyone want to humiliate themselves in public? And why on earth would anyone want to watch it?

And then it starts all over again when the next hopeful enters the room.

On a bit more serious note, I feel I might be due another 8-month wait in the black hole also known as the Finnish healthcare system. My left arm, the one with the nerve stuck in between the bones (yes, the one I'm constantly complaining about, sorry about that) has been acting up again and since my usual "ignore it and it'll go away" - tactic hasn't proved to be successful I'll probably have to take the bull by the horns and go see a doctor. I don't want another operation, even if the magic medicine they gave me made me so tranquil and peaceful I almost reached nirvana that day.

It could be that the pain goes away just as soon as things calm down at work again and I don't have to do heavy lifting and repetitive motions as much. It's just that I dropped a plate full of food into a sauce dish the other day because my fingers went suddenly numb. It's never done that before.

Meh. Old age doesn't come alone, as they say.




Things to do when feeling bored: select All music as a playlist on Media Player.
Suomen Talvisota: Mielitauti-rock
Stahlhammer: Stahlmania
Dinah Washington: Keepin' Out Of Mischief
Feeling B: Lied von der unruhevollen Jugend
Mediaeval Baebes: Erthe Upon Erthe
KC & The Sunshine Band: That's The Way I Like It
And it goes on and on...